{"product_id":"the-unholy-tomat-trinity-full-zip-hoodie","title":"The Unholy Tomat Trinity Full-Zip Hoodie","description":"\u003cp data-pm-slice=\"1 1 []\"\u003eIt is I, Señor Tomat, your magnificent, all-powerful, and devastatingly handsome tomato overlord!\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHave you ever gazed upon your miserable human wardrobe and thought, \u003cem\u003e\"Dios mío! I wish I could cover myself in the divine image of Señor Tomat!\"\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWELL, YOUR PRAYERS HAVE BEEN ANSWERED, PENDEJO!\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBehold the \u003cstrong\u003eDeep Fat Fried Unholy Tomat Trinity Full-Zip Hoodie!\u003c\/strong\u003e A glorious union of comfort, psychedelic madness, and three of the most questionable specimens ever to disgrace the podcasting profession!\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDEEP!\u003c\/strong\u003e The enlightened philosopher! His third eye sees all, his beard knows no limits, and his vape clouds carry the ancient wisdom of a thousand terrible opinions!\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFAT!\u003c\/strong\u003e An enormous monument to unchecked indulgence! A creature of such magnificent proportions that lesser tomatoes are drawn into his gravitational field!\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFRIED!\u003c\/strong\u003e A hypnotized degenerate whose swirling spectacles conceal the few remaining brain cells rattling around inside his skull! ¡QUÉ VERGÜENZA!\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAll three immortalized in a kaleidoscope of psychedelic colors, ready to accompany you wherever your miserable existence takes you!\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eZip it up when the world becomes unbearable. Unzip it when the world deserves to behold your magnificent taste in clothing!\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eTHREE TOMATS! ONE COLLECTIVE BRAIN CELL! INFINITE DEGENERACY!\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDisclaimer\u003c\/strong\u003e:\u003cbr\u003e- Due to the fabric properties, the White color variant may appear off-white rather than bright white.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e.: 50% cotton, 50% polyester\u003cbr\u003e.: Medium-heavy fabric (8 oz\/yd² (271 g\/m²))\u003cbr\u003e.: Classic fit\u003cbr\u003e.: Sewn-in label\u003cbr\u003e.: Runs true to size\u003cbr\u003e.: Embroidery decoration method available on left chest\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ctable id=\"size-guide\" style=\"min-width: 360px;\"\u003e\n\u003cthead\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"padding: 10px;\"\u003e \u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003eS\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003eM\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003eL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003eXL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003e2XL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003e3XL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/thead\u003e\n\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eWidth, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e19.25\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e21.26\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e23.23\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e25.24\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e27.24\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e29.25\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eLength, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e26.97\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e27.99\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e28.98\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e30.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e30.98\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e31.97\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eSleeve length, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e33.98\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e35.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e35.98\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e36.97\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e37.99\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e38.98\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eSize tolerance, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e1.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e1.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e1.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e1.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e1.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e1.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEU representative\u003c\/strong\u003e: HONSON VENTURES LIMITED, gpsr@honsonventures.com, 3, Gnaftis House flat 102, Limassol, Mesa Geitonia, 4003, CY\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eProduct information\u003c\/strong\u003e: Gildan 18600, two year warranty in the EU and Northern Ireland\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWarnings, Hazard\u003c\/strong\u003e: For adults\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCare instructions\u003c\/strong\u003e: Machine wash: warm (max 40C or 105F), Non-chlorine: bleach as needed, Tumble dry: medium, Iron, steam or dry: low heat, Do not dryclean\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"S \/ Navy","offer_id":50740608467184,"sku":"82397043422668450402","price":37.96,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":50740608499952,"sku":"17519298193367318387","price":37.96,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Navy","offer_id":50740608532720,"sku":"26518765307818426220","price":37.96,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":50740608565488,"sku":"14963271676778042085","price":37.96,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Navy","offer_id":50740608598256,"sku":"20442297416442553751","price":37.96,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":50740608631024,"sku":"15077178379616607177","price":37.96,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Navy","offer_id":50740608663792,"sku":"28061202042918416964","price":37.96,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":50740608696560,"sku":"86516748472285433561","price":37.96,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Navy","offer_id":50740608729328,"sku":"83942786971234755407","price":41.48,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":50740608762096,"sku":"26190964394923704947","price":41.48,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Navy","offer_id":50740608794864,"sku":"29379603312109414381","price":43.4,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Black","offer_id":50740608827632,"sku":"24128414417075876114","price":43.4,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0671\/0106\/5456\/files\/15112814131639670074_2048.jpg?v=1793958784","url":"https:\/\/pessimist.co\/products\/the-unholy-tomat-trinity-full-zip-hoodie","provider":"Onion Nuggetz","version":"1.0","type":"link"}